Here's a question:
The clothes she's wearing here are actually from the female section - whatever that is.
Ever since the very first day I started telling people I was pregnant, I started mentioning my allergy to the colour pink. Yes, I have nightmares with it. When I found out it was a girl, then I made sure everyone knew we didn't want anything in pink. Of course not everyone got the message, and that's ok.
L has some pink clothes and we use them all. We don't like to waste. My actual problem is with what pink represents and what it doesn't.
Nowadays, pink is used by "girly girls" - whatever that is.
"A girl is not a girl if she's not wearing pink!"
Unfortunately, this seems to be the rule in a lot of places I have been to, including the country where I am from and the country I live in, which drives me nuts! Here in Glasgow, I dare you to count how many babies/toddlers are not either in pink or blue, as if there is no other colour available for minors. I mean, even the pram is either pink or blue.
I had the idea for this post after someone posting a similar question on a private group. My little monkey gets to be called a boy so many times - according to society, you can only be a girl or a boy, which is very, very sad, but more on that in another post, perhaps. Even after we refer to L as she, people just assume we made a mistake (our poor English, right?) and call her a little boy. I am ok with she becoming a he, but why do people assume she is a he just because of what she's wearing?
Just like the colour spectrum, there is also a gender spectrum; and if this is an idea you are not comfortable with, well, then maybe the gender-specific colour issue shouldn't be your biggest concern.
(Couldn't find the original source online. Shame on me!)
Actually, as Rebecca Reilley-Cooper says here, gender is not a spectrum. According to her, this is an idea that is both illogical and politically troubling. She further defends that instead of trying to come up with more boxes that are neither blue or pink, we should aim at tearing them apart.
Thankfully, my "NO PINK" message gets me to try a lot of other alternatives. Even most dresses get to be taken out of the picture because of their "girly" patterns.
I don't care that L is called a boy 99 % of the times. She is what she is, and we will be here for her.
Also, Scandivia, even if extremely expensive, has some really great kids clothes where gender is almost an undefined term, so I try to get a couple of items while there. Most of L's clothes are actually second-hand either from drift stores or family and friends.
Anyway, I will keep my fight against gender stereotypes, because, well, because #girlswhocode, that's why.
Because if L decides to become a mechanic like her granddad, or a plumber like her dad, or a geek-wannabe like her mom, or a housewife (also, why isn't there a word for this job that does not assume a gender or marital status???) life her grandma and dad, then she can. She can do whatever she wants, because women can do whatever they want, just as boys and all the other gender.
Because colour, job, sexual orientation, religion (or lack of it), music taste, whatever, does not depend on the gender.